Juju Just Danced On His Own Grave

Throughout the 2020 NFL Season, it’s safe to say Juju Smith-Schuster has turned heads a number of times. From becoming a Tik Tok sensation to dancing on Teams’ logos and getting absolutely leveled for it, Smith-Schuster has seen his actions come back to haunt him (and team) more than once. With his latest choice of words, we can’t help but wonder if Smith-Schuster may have just dug his own grave, and then danced on it.

Juju Smith-Schuster dancing on the Cowboys logo pregame-2020
Juju Smith-Schuster dancing in the Bengals logo pregame-2020

Speaking with the Associated Press before Sunday’s postseason matchup, Juju stated “I think they’re still the same Browns teams I play every year,… I think they’re nameless gray faces. They have a couple good players on their team, but at the end of the day, I don’t know. The Browns is the Browns.” Bold choice of words from a player who hasn’t done much other than get completely embarrassed multiple times on the field.

Smith-Schuster and the Pittsburgh Steelers made their way to 11-0 before dropping three losses in a row and finishing the season 12-4. Their latest loss was handed to them by the Cleveland Browns who made their final push for the playoffs. Granted the Browns beat a Steelers team who was resting their starters, but still the Browns have clearly made a decent case for themselves to not be taking lightly.

Juju Smith-Schuster getting DECKED by Bengals’ Vonn Bell

Smith-Schuster shouldn’t be much of a factor this Sunday either, after not having a single game with over 100 receiving yards and tallying only 9 touchdowns on the season. With this being said, I think it goes for all of us here at BOTA that we hope this adds fuel to the fire and provides some very strong motivation for the Browns. Here’s to hoping Juju can eat his words once more this season and the Steelers get their ass handed to them by the Browns. Let’s see what these “gray faces” Browns can do to a Steelers team that is nowhere close to as talented as originally thought.

Kyrie Irving Decided Not to Play Tonight Because “He Didn’t Want To”

We all need mental health days right?? A nice day to sit back and mentally reset from all the bullshit that the world throws at us.

Kyrie Irving decided that he didn’t want to play tonight and the Internet hated it…

I’m a salty Celtics fan, so I’ll give you a chance to get off the ride here.

Still here? Really? Okay, can’t wait for your angry comments. Just know I’ll be envisioning your stupid grey blob court the entire time.

All of these people are right to be mad. Bro, there are tired teachers that would die for a quarter of what you make. They can’t take days off.

If this was truly a mental health day, then it should’ve been phrased as such. Even better, you should’ve just not answered the questions. Prioritize your mental health kids…

Kyrie added 5 gallons of fuel onto the bonfire/media target that is the Nets locker room and I love it. I’m going to sit back, grab some popcorn, and watch as the Barclays arena goes down in flames.

Will Levis is a Certified STUD

“You miss 100% of the shots you don’t take.”

Will Levis

As a quarterback, you know that you have a small window to grasp an opportunity.

As a college student, you know that a blue check mark gets you whatever you want.

Will Levis, a Penn State QB, is using his blue check mark to shoot his shot and slide into Kin Kardashian’s newly opened DMs.

Sorry Kanye… but you gotta respect the hustle.

Sure, it doesn’t mean anything because she won’t respond. Probably.

Those odds aren’t great, but if you put $10 on a 1 and a million chance you make…uhh… a lot of money (I don’t want to do simple math I’m gonna be honest…)

If Kim responds, Will will (weird) live in eternal college glory.

His scouting report will read,

Will Levis. Certified stud.

Notre Dame is Officially Cursed

WHY IS EVERY BLOG I WRITE TODAY PRO A&M

I get it, Notre Dame was one of the best teams this year and had the wins to back that; but they’ve never had a solid playoff performance.

Some could say it’s the curse of the #4 spot and I can look at that and kind of agree, but that’s not fun so fuck you.

Ian Booke: 229 1int. I gave you credit. I said you should have your name in consideration for Heisman. BUST. SHOULD’VE KEPT JURKOVEC.

This defense was supposed to be an all powerful unit, but we’ve seen them torched by Clemson and Bama. Two true playoff contenders. The only undisputed playoff favorites.

I mean shit, I would’ve watched Oklahoma get torched again over Notre Dame. Hell, put in whatever’s left of Kyle Trask. That would’ve been more interesting.

Notre Dame is cursed, they’ll be back in talk next year, they shouldn’t be, and I’ll be writing this again in 2022.

Sam Howell Has Never Had Steak and Texas Will Have Their Revenge

Three most American things in reverse order, Steak, Football, and Hummers. I’m not sure if Sam Howell has ever driven a Hummer or even if he’s seen one, but I know one thing for sure. He’s never tasted steak or had a burger.

In the frenzy of media interviews before the Orange Bowl, Sam was asked to say a random fact about himself. He chose to reveal that he only eats chicken and has never tasted steak.

Dude, you’re about to face the best team in Texas in Texas A&M (yes that felt weird to say) and you’re going to reveal that you’ve never graced your tastebuds with the most glorious gift from the food gods, beef? They’re going to eat you medium rare with a baked potato.

Hey Howell, is your Chicken Nuggies enough to be a champion? No. Side note. Any adult who says “Chicken Nuggies or Chicken Tendies” is a fucking toddler who shouldn’t be allowed to join society until they learn how to speak like an adult. Go back to your crib and watch Frozen.

Don’t take my triggered chicken take wrong, I’ll indulge in some CHICKEN NUGGETS (certified adult), but you can’t give A&M an inch in this game you just gave them a whole mile.

Gig ‘Em

This Recruit Won National Signing Day

Names in college football are often comedic. That comedy goes front and center when national signing day comes around.

Okay sure you often get kids who look like grown ass men.

Example A.

That’s all well and good for Kendrick Blackshire who has shocked the world by committing to Alabama. He didn’t win the day though.

Well James, if a scary 18-year old who’s going to give you nightmares didn’t win National signing day, who did?

I’ll tell you imaginary voice that’s actually my voice that I made your voice… *what*

Laaaadies and gentlemen, standing in at 6’3 180 pounds. Quarterback out of Allen Texas. He’s not a solider, he’s not a captain, no no…. itssss

GENERAL BOOTY!!!!!

This is the greatest name in the history of sports. I’ve never wanted an athlete to succeed more. Baker who? Na fam. General Booty.

He doesn’t have any power 5 offers as of right now, but you can be damn sure I’m going to root for this kid to be the next NCAA star.

Team Bonding: IG Model Claims She “Orally Pleased” 7 Phoenix Suns Players

You might remember the article I wrote about the fact that players in their bubbles need to uhh… “release”

Never. Ever. Not in a million years. Would I expect this story to come out of that same idea (awful choice of words).

Apparently, some IG model named Aliza was snuck into the Suns Hotel and felatioed, gave felatio, uhhh screw it. She blew 7 Suns players at the same time.

Note. The Celtics chose to play dodgeball and bowl together for bonding. The Suns got simultaneous head. One of those teams went undefeated. They also, didn’t make the playoffs so you win some you lose some.

There’s not much else to say about this whole situation so I’m going to list off some James jokes.

-I bet the Suns thought they would only be tested for COVID, boy were they wrong!

– I guess you can call them the rising Suns. (Boner joke)

-I wonder who called her over, who do you think was the Booker. 👀

-its a shame they didn’t make the playoffs, that really Blows.

Better Late Than Never; My Thoughts On Cam Newton

With the New England Patriots signing Cam Newton, most fans were excited for the addition of a “veteran” Quarterback joining the team. On the other side was me; cringing with the fact that my two worst nightmares came true. First was of course Tom Brady leaving, second was the Pats bringing in Cam Newton as a replacement. However, I’ve had some time to sit and think and I’m here to express my opinions on the matter and that Cam Newton will be either a boom or a bust candidate for the Patriots.

I’ve been pretty vocal with my thoughts on Cam Newton in the past, and I still stand by my arguments to an extent, but I do feel if handled the right way, Cam Newton can be a great addition to the Patriots. In previous years, offenses revolved around Newton. Newton saw himself as a one-man show and that was that. Numerous times, I was disgusted at the fact that receivers would be wide-open down field and yet Newton still ran the ball himself. Granted my bias comes from the fact that I’m not a big running-qb man, but I still feel strongly as though the Panthers offense wasn’t clockwork, it was what Newton felt like doing on that play. I think that led to the arrogance that I personally despised out of Newton. I hated him on the field, and more off the field. I thought he was a cocky douchebag who thought the world revolves around him. However, on the Patriots, none of what I mentioned above will stand.

On the Patriots, “Do Your Job” isn’t just a motto, it’s the way of life and how the Patriots achieve so much success. The Patriots work around every single player on that offense and make it all connect perfectly for what we’ve known for decades. Bill Bellichick and Josh Mcdaniels have certain ways about them that create these factors. With Newton on the team, this shouldn’t change anything, and I believe that’s why we see Newton being goal driven and so optimistic to work with the Patriots this season.

On the Patriots, Newton knows that his personal success means nothing. What makes the Patriots stick out is the teamwork. Now obviously I know every team of course has strong teamwork, but yet again and again the Patriots show that theirs is like no other. The Pats make success of utilizing every single position on the field. That means utilizing every receiver, tight end, lineman, and even the quarterback. What this means is that, if Cam Newton comes into the Patriots offense knowing that he has so many options to choose from every play, he could be a huge success. Newton can change the whole scheme of that offense to turn around him and ruin what was once an amazing amount of success. What Newton can also do, is tweak the offense and form with it, creating a scary scenario of a huge quarterback with great running sense, observational awareness, and the ability to spread the field like no other. Let’s hope it’s the latter.

I feel strongly as though Newton feels he has something to prove. With a contract that isn’t worth much, and the thought of knowing that he has to work harder than ever before, Cam Newton May be able to improve his biggest weaknesses and shine like never before. Given the fact that The patriots have now lost crucial lineman for the season, I believe this season will be the true groundbreaking year for Newton as he shows the true potential he holds to carry a team to victory, or to be left out to dry.

Welcome To The Joe Kelly Fight Club

Los Angeles Dodgers Pitcher Joe Kelly has recently been suspended 8 games for throwing behind Houston Astros players Alex Bregman and Carlos Correa. Which is funny, because now the MLB is protecting the Astros, after catching them cheating and letting all the Astros players get by with absolutely no punishments. So Rob Manfred and the MLB are now being children and are going to punish every single retaliation to the Astros. Absolutely unacceptable.

The Astros got caught stealing signs. THEY KNEW EVERY PITCH!!! The evidence is clear as day and the MLB handled it terrible. The Astros organization lied, tried to cover up evidence, and fabricated stories every step of the way, and yet every player was given immunity. And now, retaliation against the Astros (which is very personal throughout the league) is not going to be accepted.

I side with Joe Kelly here and I hope he appeals the hell out of this suspension. I am appalled that the MLB would issue such a harsh penalty when neither player was even hit. Since the punishments were handed out and avoided for the Astros, players have been very vocal of their feelings towards the Astros players getting by without any serious penalties. The retaliations were expected this season and Joe Kelly has been at the fore front of this catastrophe. Joe Kelly is now on the Dodgers, who currently despise the Astros for their scandalous wins while cheating. To add to the the matter Joe Kelly was a part of the Red Sox, which was already a heated rivalry with the Astros before the cheating scandals. Joe Kelly deserves to be set free and when he is, I hope he comes out swinging.

I hope Joe Kelly comes out of this suspension swinging. Bring us the fire and don’t fuck with Joe Kelly. If the MLB is gonna play childish, at least let Joe Kelly throw some shade. Joe Kelly helped re-ignite the Red Sox-Yankees rivalry. He was a god for the Red Sox. The “don’t give a fuck” attitude is exactly what we need in the MLB, especially from a pitcher. Joe Kelly is an MLB god who isn’t afraid to say shit like it is and call out problems that need fixing. Him throwing at Bergman and Correa was the perfect response that “even though the season was shortened, we didn’t forget what you guys did, and this shows how much we hate you”. It’s the perfect scenario to remind everyone watching, and everyone in the MLB that we still hate the Astros and we all want to watch them burn. Show us what you got Joe.

Joe Kelly Has the Largest Set of Rocks of Any Man, Ever

Okay, so the lead photo doesn’t do my statement any justice, but if you’re from Boston you love this man.

Joe Kelly reignited the rivalry between the Sox and Yankees with one pitch.

Well… one pitch and a few punches, but you get the idea right?

It’s not often that you see a relief pitcher stand out on the Sox, but Joe Kelly was an ICON in Boston. He was the first relief pitcher I was sad to see leave.

Fast forward to the Astros and everyone hating their existence and us restarting the season.

Joe Kelly wasn’t on the Dodgers in 2017. He was on the Red Sox. Could there be some hatred there from a 3-1 series? I’d say no, but I’m not Joe. He pulled this move last night as a clear rebuttal to the trash can bangers.

Kinda loses the effect without a crowd cheering and jeering.

I want to point out, this was Joe’s only strike out that night. Before that, he walked Bregman and buckled another hitter.

Good ol’ Joe decided to slam his massive nuts on the table and make the Astros stare with envy.

I can’t pretend like I’d do any different. If I struck out a toddler, I’d still strut around like I was a golden god. I’d make that diaper wearing fuck realize how dominant I am on the mound. (Spoiler: not very dominant.)

I love the taunt and celebration from you Joe, but maybe next time get one more strike out before you start taunting the Buzzers aka the Houston ASStros.