Cass Money Chronicles: Coronavirus Update 1

Dear Diary,

Been having some trouble lately. There’s this hole in my heart that I cannot fill. Sports are postponed. Food is scarce. Panic is everywhere. Toilet paper is the new currency. I have resorted to using my welcome mat to wipe my ass and my spit as hand soap. Hand sanitizer is currently being made in my bathtub but the last test had left third-degree burns on my body.

The internet is my last resort to a normal life. I’m worried it may be wiped out soon. I have done what I can to enjoy this time while it lasts. I’ve been rewatching past sports for the last two days, enjoying what once was. Watched women’s tennis last night on television, cried the whole time cherishing the last of live sports.

Time is no longer a factor to my days. My schedule consists of waking up, covering myself in my homemade hand-sanitizer, working and dealing with my skin burns, and heading straight home to enjoy my Internet in solitude. I have attempted to board up my windows and doors but have run out of nails. I don’t know how much longer I can hold the fort down. I believe Call of Duty has prepared me well for what is to come. I have prepped my bugout bag to consist of only bare essentials but have already consumed all my quarantine food.

I dream of a day again where we can live in harmony. Where sports stadiums are packed with excited fans. Where alcohol is consumed for fun rather to survive a deadly virus. Where grocery stores are stocked to the brim. Where hand washing is a way of life rather then a panic stricken feat.

I will keep this updated as time goes on. I’m off to explore the unknown in search of a safe haven. Please remember my name if something were to arise.

#cassmoney OUT

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